Thursday, January 5, 2012


I'm still not sure which lesson I'm being taught, but am pretty sure I'm being taught something.  I was offered a job (thankfully!), but said job pays half the amount I was previously making.  This has been really  hard for me to swallow...not necessary for financial issues, but for pride issues.  I asked God to provide me with a job an He did.  It wasn't the job I was hoping for, but I know there's a reason He chose this job for me.  My next big issue to work through (seems like there are a lot of these lately) is to get over my pride and learn to accept the path God leads me down.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

New Year/New Outlook

As the new year begins, I'm having a hard time entering with a positive attitude.  2011 was a year filled with many blessings, all of which I'm very thankful for.  It was also a year that I struggled with accepting God's plan for my life.  I'm very organized, sometimes to a fault.  I like to plan out every detail of my day, week, and yes, even life.  This relentless planning often is my own demise.  I would love to be able to obtain a career in which I can grow.  Maybe I place too much of my self identity in a job, but this has always been a desire of mine.  In my three years as a technical writer, I was excited at the prospect of moving up the corporate ladder in this particular field.  Unfortunately, this job ended in December and left we with many questions, sadness, and uncertainties.  I think I've finally been able to accept the fact that as a military wife, I will most likely never be able to obtain a job that I could call a career.  At the same time, I'm still struggling to accept other areas in my life that aren't currently matching up with my plan.  I would love to receive a master's degree, but it's not financially feasible right now.  I would love to have children, but that's not in God's plan for the time being.  One of my favorite verses is Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." It's comforting, through all my worrying, knowing that His plans are best.

Josh will be gone 9 months out of 2012.  So how do I look at this new year and enter it with excitement and hope?  I hope this post doesn't sound like I'm not thankful for the situation I've been put in.  That's not the case at all!  In fact, I wouldn't change it for a thing. I am so thankful for a wonderful husband, a comfortable home, and loving family and friends. I know I have countless things to be thankful for (all of which I am extremely thankful for).   I plan to make the best of the 9 months that Josh is gone.  The only way to go into a situation like this is with a positive attitude (and constant faith and trust in God). I definitely believe that this time away will only make our marriage stronger.  I believe that this time will force me (thankfully) to lean on God more.   

So cheers to 2012!  I pray that it will be a wonderful year!