Be forewarned, I’m about to vent. Maybe I’m choosing this blog as my source of frustration release due to the fact that I have an audience of two. :) I’m that person that can’t stand people constantly venting on Facebook. Not all of us like to see your issues on an hourly basis. Too mean?
With that said, there are some things that I just need to get off my chest. Yesterday was tough. I’m a worrier; we all know that. Take my regular worrying and multiply it by ten when Josh is deployed. Then take that and multiple it by one hundred when Josh is deployed AND there is a blackout. A blackout (from what I understand) is when a casualty has happened and all forms of Internet or communication are pulled until the next of kin is notified. Usually, when I suddenly don’t hear from Josh for a while, my first guess is that some sort of blackout has occurred. I’m not going to lie, this is a sick to the stomach kind of feeling. Knowing that a casualty has occurred, but not knowing if your husband is ok makes the stress of deployment just a LITTLE more stressful. I admit, I have looked out the window multiple times during blackouts. I’m terrified that the doorbell will ring. At the same time, I think about the family members that have to receive that message at their front door. I never want it to be me, but why is it fair that it has to be another wife, mother, child, etc.?
It also makes me livid to think about all the people that ignorantly assume that our war is over or that nothing is really happening over there. Men and women are killed almost every day in action. It really upsets me that men and women are putting their lives on the line every single day, and the people, going about their daily lives over here, don't really seem to care.
Told you I was gong to vent. Vent over!