Doubting, Uncertainty......Faith, Trusting

Ok, so I don't really talk about our trouble trying to conceive (mainly because people don't understand).  But right now, I'm kind of at the point where I just need to write about it.  Honestly, most of the things I write in this blog are simply for my own sake...so that I can return to it down the road and remember so many wonderful aspects of my life.

I had a really tough night last night.  I was a couple days late, and even though I knew better, I began to get my hopes up....simply to be saddened by that nasty little thing we call miss flow.  I wanted to vent, cry, complain, etc to Josh but the fact that he's on the other side of the world in a completely different time zone makes things a little difficult.  Instead, I cried on my bed, somewhat angry, but mostly disappointed.  I'm not saying this to try to make people feel sorry for me.  I'm simply writing down my feelings...as raw as they are.

I am thankful for a wonderful husband who never fails to remind me that God has a purpose for our lives and that we need to trust that His plan is best.  Still.....this is much easier said than done.

Honestly, I'm tired of seeing everyone pregnant and having babies.  I'm happy for them, but it's still hard to see.  I want to grab women by the neck when they complain about being pregnant.  Again, maybe I'm not detailing the best side of me, but I'm being honest.

I'm very thankful for the life God has given me.  I've been so blessed.  Sometimes I just need to slow down and dwell on the amazing aspects of my life instead of the aspects that I can't control.